If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
