Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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