I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
