I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Randomize
