They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Randomize
