Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
True strength comes from lack of pants
I am available for nakedness
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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