What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
We have started to decorate penises.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
