He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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