I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Randomize