Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
