If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I have aggressive nipples.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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