I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
i out mim tonsoeep
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
