How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
