My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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