definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
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