Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
