let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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