Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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