Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
