I'm drive I can fine osifer
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize