booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
As shirtless as possible
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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