did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
