Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(816): View more from Missouri

His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court

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(661): View more from California

His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger

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(330): View more from Ohio

He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.

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(514): View more from Quebec

Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.

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(847): View more from Illinois

He tried peeing out of the sunroof.

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(530): View more from California

she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again

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(407): View more from Florida

You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.

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