I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
well you can't waste a boner
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Randomize
