So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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