You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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