gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Four minutes until I can fart!
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
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