At least make sure they are 18
Why
Your mouth is God's brothel.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize
