Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
