Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(305): View more from Florida

3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over

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(917): View more from New York City

giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?

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(+49): View more from Germany

Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever

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Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Read it at the TFLN blog
(850): View more from Florida

I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad

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(847): View more from Illinois

All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.

(773): View more from Illinois

that bad?

(847): View more from Illinois

u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.

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(916): View more from California

So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.

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(407): View more from Florida

Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..

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(503): View more from Oregon

I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.

(503): View more from Oregon

OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE

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