he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I lost the right to judge tonight
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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