if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
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