Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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