Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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