If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
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