Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
A+ Viking dick
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize