Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
i think i just lost a toe
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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