I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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