Hey man sorry I got all grabby
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
