a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
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