my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
