i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize