Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
