Nicole vs. Life
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
