I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Randomize