I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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