you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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