1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize