I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize