if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
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i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
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I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"